Fearne Cotton reveals how she became her 'true self' at 43 - her approach to ageing is so worth hearing

Fearne Cotton spoke candidly about finding her authentic self on Davina McCall's Begin Again podcast

Fearne Cotton header image
(Image credit: Getty Images)

Fearne Cotton has revealed the joy she's found since turning 43, with 'ageing' not being the 'terrible' experience women are told about but actually something that's helped her became her ‘true self'.

At what age did you feel like you were showing up as your 'true self'? It's a big question, isn't it?

Many of us may still feel like we're not doing that just yet. Whether it's because we're worried about what people will think of that true self, or because we don't actually know who our true self is just yet. But Fearne Cotton has reminded us that it's never too late to figure it out and start showing up as the person we really are.

"I turned 43 this week," she said when she was asked that very question on Davina McCall's Begin Again podcast. "And it's great!" She sounded surprised when she said it, revealing that she was worried about what the age would bring for her, mainly because women are often told that getting older is not a good thing by any means.

But, echoing Helen Mirren's recent admission about ageing, Fearne said she's only found good things in getting older. "You know, women are constantly - and this is obvious, I'm not saying anything new here but - are talked about like ageing is such a terrible thing," she said. "And that we have to do so much and spend so much money to try and stop it happening. But I'm only experiencing great things."

One of those great things is finally letting go of the insecurities and worries she's held since her twenties, with her finally now deciding to be her true and authentic self no matter what people might think.

She shared, "What I'm talking about is a sense of feeling like I'm in my own body and feeling like I can be me rather than a filtered version of myself or an extra version of myself because I'm not quite enough or whatever I might have thought in my twenties."

"I'm just going to turn up as me now and that will differ on any given day. But actually, I really like the feeling of that comfort of just being myself."

Fans and celebrity friends of Fearne were quick to flood the comments with their own stories of discovering their true selves in their forties and beyond, with fellow TV presenter Katy Hill being just one to share.

"LOVE Fearne," she wrote. "And yes to feeling like you’re fully in your body! I’m the comfiest at 53 I ever have been." And another fan echoed, "I felt this as I approached the transition from 42 to 43. The last 18 months of my life have been so fulfilling, so freeing, just being able to be the me that I was meant to be. I’m 44 next month and I cannot wait to embrace the next chapter."

It's a sentiment Fearne reiterated in a recent Instagram post where she shared that's she's been trying to lessen the 'tight grip' she's always tried to keep on her life, a grip that was hindering her and stopping her from having fun as she tried to avoid mess.

"Healing yourself looks like having fun," she wrote in a notebook before snapping a picture and posting it to her grid. In the comments she explained that this idea had been a recent 'revelation' for her for a heartbreaking reason.

She explained, "If you have followed me on here for a while you'll have probably heard me say how much I hate parties, going out, etc. This has been something I've told myself to create a form of protection from feeling scared.

"For over ten years fun felt dangerous. If I let loose, lost any amount of control, or stayed out too late it didn't feel safe. There was a subconscious feeling that something dreadful might happen if I let myself have fun."

But, in her 43rd year, she revealed that she's starting to let herself have fun again - and we're so happy for her!

"I've realised that allowing myself to have fun has only benefitted me and those around me. I've lessened the tight grip I had on a life a little, allowed myself to be a bit messy and given myself a break.In other words.... FUN Fearne is back."

Charlie Elizabeth Culverhouse
Freelance news writer

Charlie Elizabeth Culverhouse is a freelance royal news, entertainment and fashion writer. She began her journalism career after graduating from Nottingham Trent University with an MA in Magazine Journalism, receiving an NCTJ diploma, and earning a First Class BA (Hons) in Journalism at the British and Irish Modern Music Institute. She has also worked with Good To, BBC Good Food, The Independent, The Big Issue and The Metro.