The 15 best lesbian sex positions for monumental orgasms

The best lesbian sex positions can help take your love life to a whole new level of intimacy. Whether you're new to having sex with a woman and looking for advice or you've been doing it for years and are looking to spice things up, these are the expert-recommended positions to try. 

There's a lot more to lesbian sex than the movies would have us believe. It's not all about scissoring or using a sex toy to mimic the actions of heterosexual sex - unless you want it to be. But with so much of our sex education revolving around heteronormative and binary ideas of what sex looks like, with the almost-total exclusion of queer and lesbian sex education in schools, it's perhaps no surprise that many people think this.

When we approach things from a non-biased perspective, everything becomes clearer. Here, woman&home speaks to several sex educators, therapists, and sexual health doctors specialising in women's health to determine the best sex positions, plus all the tips you may need for your first time or next time with a woman. 

The best lesbian sex positions 

1. The wedge

How to do it: The wedge is easily one of the best oral sex positions, explains Lyndsey Murray, a certified sex and relationship therapist specializing in LGBTQ+ relationships. "This is where you a put a wedge, such as a pillow, underneath your lower back while you are lying down. It offers a comfortable angle for your partner to give you oral sex and gives them easier access to your G-spot, should penetration happen with either their hands or a sex toy."

"With the G-spot being on the vaginal wall, about an inch or so inside the vaginal opening, one way to hit this spot in the wedge position is with your index finger or index and middle finger in a 'come here' motion."

Why it's great: While the name may not have very sexy connotations, this is one of the best lesbian sex positions for blended orgasms, which is a clitoral and vaginal orgasm simultaneously. The giving partner can stimulate their partner's clitoris with their mouth and G-spot with their fingers at the same time, while the addition of the wedge brings the bottom partner slightly off the bed for easier access. 

Make it sexier: Experimenting with different intensities, like hard and soft touches and licks, is one way to really take the wedge to the next level. As it's a low-intensity position to begin with, you're not confined by the same time pressures as you would be with more cardio-intense ones so be sure to take your time.  

Need to move for better comfort? The receiver can push their legs out behind them to do the sniper sex position, alleviating any potential stress on the lower back. 

2. Missionary

How to do it: This position involves one partner lying on their back on the bed while the other lies between their partner's legs. Both partners can use their fingers or one of the best sex toys for vulva and clitoris stimulation from this angle, and opt for penetrative sex if everyone's into it. To maximize G-spot stimulation in this position, both partners can use a ‘come here’ motion on the front wall of their partner's vagina, closest to the belly button.

“The first third of the vaginal canal is the most sensitive," explains Dr Eleanor Draeger, a sexual health doctor. "It's the one surrounded by the bulbs and legs of the clitoris so you’ll be stimulating the clitoral cluster just by staying a couple of centimeters in."

Why it's great: While it might be a little cramped with multiple hands navigating their way around, missionary is one of the most intimate of all the best lesbian sex positions as it allows for eye contact and kissing the whole way through. 

Make it sexier: Try propping up the receiver with a pillow or wedge for easier access to the receiver’s vulva and deeper penetration for access to the G-spot. 

3. Facesitting or queening

How to do it: In this position, the receiving partner kneels with their knees on either side of their partner's face while their partner performs oral sex and uses their hands to caress their partner's thighs and butt. 

Why it’s great: “The receiving partner has more control over the pace and rhythm, as they can rock their hips back and forth - a motion that can also increase the chance of orgasm. They can also use their hands to massage their breasts and nipples. That's a whole lot of stimulation,” says Uren. 

Make it sexier: Introducing some bondage for beginners can take this position to new heights, provided you're both up for it. Experiment with restricting movement or tying hands using ropes, silky restraints, or handcuffs. Alternatively, add blindfolds and collars, and leashes to control how you and your partner move while in this position. 

4. Vibe time

How to do it: To do this position, all you'll really need is your best vibrator or pick of the best lesbian sex toys. The partner on the bottom lies down on their back in front of the other partner, with their legs spread and resting on the other's partner's thighs or bent at the knees. The partner holding the toy starts the vibrations on a low level and gently works around the vulva, focusing on the clitoris.

Why it's great: This position can be totally customized to suit both partner's desires, whether that's exclusively clitoral stimulation or penetrative sex, as you can pick between all the most common types of vibrators as you please. 

It another good position for potentially having a blended orgasm, says Dr Draeger. "The key to blended orgasms in this position is simple,” she explains. “A good mix of internal and external stimulation.” If you use one of the best rabbit vibrators, you'll get familiar with the idea very quickly as these are designed to stimulate two areas at the same time. 

“But not everyone will be able to have a blended orgasm,” warns the doctor. “If you want to try, the best way to achieve one would be to get yourself into a position like this where you can stimulate more than one of your partner's erogenous zones at the same time.” This position makes it easy to use a vibrator on your partner's clitoris, for example, while also stimulating their nipples with your other hand. 

Make it sexier: You can really play around with the power dynamics and intensity of this position. As the bottom partner's legs are draped over the top partner's, there's nothing stopping the top partner from changing up the position and moving over the top of the bottom partner so they're face to face. This allows the top partner to kiss the bottom while using the vibrator on them.

5. 69 sex position

How to do it: The 69 sex position is another common oral sex position. Partners lie top to tail, one over the other. The top partner rests on their knees and elbows, positioning themselves over their partner's face with their face over their partner. 

Why it's great: “There's a reason the 69 is sex position royalty," says Dr Draeger. "There's something so crazily arousing about the responsiveness of this position. The more pleasure you feel, the more intensely you pleasure your partner in response. It's a position that couples can do together at the same time too, rather than taking turns."

Make it sexier: Isabelle Uren, a certified master sexpert with degrees in psychology and cognitive semiotics, says, “Use one of the best lubes to help your fingers glide over your partner's clitoris and experiment with different movements and pressures, such as tapping or circling the clitoris, and consider using clitoral suction vibrators if you find yourself getting tired."

6. The sideways 69

How to do it: Instead of one partner being on top, the sideways 69 sex position has both partners lying on their sides, top to tail with their legs open, using lips and tongues to stimulate the whole vulva. 

Why it’s great: This is the 69 sex position but not as you know it. It's much more comfortable for all involved, with the top partner resting on their side rather than propping themselves up on their elbows or hands.

Make it sexier: Kiss, lick, and nibble breasts, nipples, and other erogenous zones on your partner. Normally if you were on the bottom, you'd not be able to move too much but the sideways position offers more freedom of movement for all involved. Align your mouths with each other’s vulvas, breasts, and stomachs, and use your hands for added sensation. 

7. Tribbing

How to do it: "Tribbing is the act of rubbing genitals together. It's essentially what's known as scissoring, it just went through a rebrand," says Javay Frye-Nekrasova(MEd), a certified sex educator. "To trib, you are going to want to try your best to align your genitals with your partner. One of the most common ways is to have one partner lying on their side with their legs spread, one leg out and one leg up with the knee bent. The other partner comes in with their legs spread, scooching their butt and genitals as close as possible to their partner's." 

Why it's great: There's not too many lesbian sex positions apart from missionary and the sideways 69 where both partners can be pleasured at the same time. But tribbing or scissoring, whatever you want to call it, is one of them if you can make it work. The move also allows for stimulation of the entire vulva, not just the clitoris, so it's a great position even just to warm up with. 

Make it sexier: "When it comes to scissoring, don't make touching genitals the end all be all. Grinding your vulva against a partner's thigh can be just as stimulating and you can even add a little something extra, like a thigh strap-on harness for penetrative play," Fry-Nekrasova, who works in collaboration with Lovehoney.com, says.

8. The Ballet Dancer

How to do it: The ballet dancer sex position is one of the easiest moves for oral sex, explains Murray. "Stand straight up and lean against a wall while your partner kneels and performs oral sex on you," she says. If you are the standing partner, move your leg to the side to give your partner access or place it on your partner's outstretched knee. If you are the kneeling partner, you can use a vibrator on yourself while giving pleasure to your partner, allowing for a simultaneous orgasm if you time it right. 

Why it's great: The ballet dancer isn't only really easy as the receiving partner can steady themselves against the wall behind them, but it's also one of the best positions for standing sex as it allows for equal access to the clitoris and G-spot. And as Dr Draeger says, "Any position that allows you to combine this with direct stimulation of the clitoris is a winner for having a blended orgasm."

Make it sexier: "If you are the partner who is kneeling, remember to use a pillow under your knees to make the position more comfortable," Murray adds. You could also both stand during the position." 

9. Kneeling spoons

How to do it: If you’d like to take spooning to a new level, try kneeling while spooning. While both kneeling, the giving partner can reach around to stimulate their partner's clitoris with their fingers or a wand vibrator. The receiving partner can also rock back and forth, grinding their clitoris against their partner's hand.

Why it’s great: The biggest issue with spooning while lying down is that one arm is always partially restricted, so this modification allows for much more freedom. This position creates intense closeness and plenty of opportunities to use fingers and toys for extra sensation. 

Make it sexier: Position your partner between your body and a wall so you can control the intensity of your movements and restrict theirs. With your partner facing the wall you can kiss their neck, whisper into their ear, and press their body firmly against the surface in front while you grind against them. You can also hold their hands in place against the wall if you’re both comfortable with doing so. 

10. Classic cowgirl

How to do it: The classic cowgirl position, aka one person lying down while the other is seated on top of them, can be one of the most enjoyable lesbian sex positions. Begin by straddling your partner and moving as you would when using your hands to masturbate while seated. Then use your hips to grind together and stimulate your and your partner’s vulva. 

Why it’s great: This position allows the person on top to control the speed, pressure, and intensity. As they are in control, the person on top can relax into the sensation without feeling uncomfortable. If you’re capable of achieving multiple orgasms, this is also the perfect position to attempt a few in a row. 

Make it sexier: Some find adding vaginal penetration too intense in this position, so remember that you can experiment with sensation in other ways by using toys like nipple clamps, handcuffs, and silky ties too, and with stimulation by simply introducing dirty talk, kissing, and touching.

11. Reverse cowgirl

How to do it: The reverse cowgirl sex position is much the same as the cowgirl, except the partner on top faces away from their partner.  

Why it's great: "The reverse cowgirl is a good move for anyone who might find direct G-spot stimulation too intense. The bottom partner's fingers or a sex toy will touch this sensitive area indirectly during this position instead, which can feel more pleasurable for some people," says Dr Draeger. 

Make it sexier: Introduce a toy that stimulates both partners, such as a double-ended dildo or a strap-on with a bullet vibrator in the set-up. 

12. Leaning reverse cowgirl

How to do it: Facing away from the partner on the bottom, the cowgirl leans back, bracing themselves against their partner on the bed or the mattress. 

Why it's great: The leaning reverse cowgirl offers all the benefits of the traditional reverse cowgirl - with added intimacy. As the partner on top leans backwards in this move, their head and torso are closer to the bottom partner, meaning there's more opportunity for kissing, touching, and stimulation. 

Make it sexier: As always, introducing a touch of additional stimulation into the mix will only make things better. 

13. Stand and deliver

How to do it: Another excellent standing pose, this one requires one partner to stand facing a surface they can brace themselves against like a wall or table. The other partner stands behind them, reaching around to access their clitoris.

Why it's great: For easy-access clitoral stimulation, this position is one of the best. It's the easiest part of the vulva to reach for the giving partner, but it's also ideal for touching all of the erogenous zones. "This position leads to clitoral stimulation with the giving partner's hands, as well as touching of the breasts and nipples. It can also be used in combination with kissing on the receiving partner's back and neck," says Dr Draeger. The giving partner can also access their partner's G-spot by putting their hand between their legs from the back.

Make it sexier: There's no reason why both partners can't benefit from this position. To make this standing doggy-style sex position even sexier, the receiving partner can reach behind themselves with their pick of the best wand vibrators and bring their partner to orgasm at the same time. The additional length of a wand will make this easier than with a bullet, for example. 

14. Spooning

How to do it: Lie down in the spooning position, as if you're just having a cuddle. "The so-called 'big spoon' reaches over their partner and down to stimulate their clitoris either manually or with a vibrator," suggest Uren. "Alternatively, the partner at the back can turn this into a penetrative position by using their fingers or a strap-on."

Why it’s great: This position can feel safer for those who are perhaps a little more body conscious as both partners are lying down facing away from each other. It's also great for creating intimacy and slow, mindful tantric sex.

Make it sexier: Adding your favorite sex toys, such as a strap-on or vibrator, can be a game-changer in this position. With your and your partners’ hands-free to explore, use multiple toys for a range of stimulation and spend as much time as you like lying comfortably together. It's also very easy to slip into a different position from here - try out the broken eagle sex position for even more G-spot stimulation and a different angle.

15. Doggy style

How to do it: For two people with vulvas, one person kneels on all fours and the other applies pressure to the receiver from behind. This can be with hands, their mouth, or with toys. Whether you opt for external stimulation of the clitoris, penetration of the vagina or the anus, or all three is totally up to you. Just be sure to go slow as this can be a vulnerable position for the receiver. 

Why it’s great: “Positions like this, where your partner stimulates you from behind, gives them a great view of your butt," says Uren. "You can also use furniture and props to help you feel more supported, such as on all fours with pillows underneath you. You can also take it out of the bedroom and lean over a kitchen counter or chair, for some additional excitement."

Make it sexier: There are so many ways to make the all-fours position sexier, from having the receiver hold a vibrator against their own clitoris to using an alternative surface like a table, mirroring the butterfly sex position and leapfrog sex position. You could also use toys like ticklers, crops, and floggers for gentle to more intense stimulation externally as well. The thrill is in trusting your partner whilst not knowing what might come next, so if you're into zodiac sex positions it may not surprise you to know that this move is one for the water signs. 

The myths about lesbian sex 

There are plenty of myths out there that may affect how we view lesbian sex. The most prevalent one is the idea that scissoring, tribbing - aka the act of rubbing one’s vulva against someone else’s - or using a sex toy like a strap-on is the only way to enjoy lesbian sex. This is closely followed by the concept that in order to enjoy lesbian sex fully, one person must assume the role of ‘the man’.  

These ideas are so far from the truth. While tribbing and using sex toys may work for some people, and they do appear on our list, they're by no means the full picture of what lesbian sex is like because the full picture looks different for everyone. 

“Lesbian sex is not a performance. It can be as intimate and explorative as we want it to be,” says Dr Draeger. "There's no set formula, no equation for success in the bedroom. It's all about doing what those involved find the most pleasurable, enjoying the process of being together, trying different positions, maybe using a sex toy if you both want to and exploring what feels good together." 

Tips for having lesbian sex

• Know your own anatomy: "It may seem like a 'duh' kind of statement but the vulva is the least-taught part of the body, meaning most people don't know all the parts and most definitely not the clitoris," says Javay Frye-Nekrasova. "Understanding anatomy is what helps to ensure pleasure."
• Talk about what you enjoy with your partner: There's a popular narrative that everyone will like the same thing in the bedroom when it comes to lesbian sex, but that's not the case. "Not everyone enjoys oral stimulation," she says. "So actually have a discussion about what you each enjoy to ensure it's a pleasurable time for all." 
• Be honest and upfront: "If it's your first time having lesbian sex, there may be some nerves or anxiety and you may feel like you don't know what you're doing. That's okay, we all start from a point of not knowing. Letting your partner know rather than just trying to wing it will be better than potentially having a bad experience," Frye-Nekrasova says. "Your partner can then be a little more vocal and hands-on about how they like to be touched and pleasured, which will benefit you both."
• Talk about safe sex practices: "There is also the notion that you don't have to have safer sex practices with vulva-and-vulva sex but that's not true either. Be sure to have a conversation about it. Will you use dental dams for oral sex? Latex gloves and finger cots for digital stimulation? Condoms on insertable toys?" Discuss all the options, she suggests, because everyone will have a preference.