The best oral sex positions to try with a partner, from 69 to standing
These are the best oral sex positions, according to sexologists, and how to do them
Trying out new oral sex positions can be a great way to change up your foreplay or bring something entirely new to the bedroom. From classic moves like the 69 to creative ways to target the clitoris, these are the oral sex positions recommended by sexologists and sex educators.
When it comes to what we like in the bedroom, everyone is different. Oral sex, giving head, going down, cunnilingus - whatever you want to call it - is the epitome of this. What works for you may not work for someone else and even if you know exactly what you like, it's always worth checking in, trying something new, and talking with your partner about what pleases you the most.
That being said, there are some very popular oral sex positions for a reason. These are among the best moves to target the clitoris and G-spot, as well as being some of the best sex positions and best lesbian sex positions generally. Switch between them and the sexologists assure us you'll experience a new spark in your sex life.
The best oral sex positions
1. ON YOUR BACK
When you think about oral sex positions, this position is the one that probably comes to mind first. It's comfortable for most people and if you want to know how to make missionary sex better, starting with oral sex could be the best way forward.
"It's a classic position that's ideal for those who may have physical constraints and where comfort is a priority," says Madalaine Munro, a certified sexologist specializing in somatic sexology and psycho-sexual therapy.
"I also recommend this position for those who are newer to oral sex. It can feel vulnerable and possibly overwhelming. This position can create some ease and relaxation while exploring something new," she says. "Both the giver and the receiver are on the same level, so it may feel easier to communicate and give feedback while in this position."
How to do it: The person receiving should lie on their back, whether that's on a bed, couch, or another flat surface, with their their legs open and bent at the knees. This offers a little more space for the giver to position their torso between the legs. To make sure that the giver is hitting the receiver's clitoris, they can reach an arm around the receiver's legs to the top of their vulva and open it using their fingers.
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"You can play with sensation by the receiver changing the angle of their legs or perhaps wrapping them around the giver," says Munro, a great piece of advice for those looking to dial up the intensity.
One potential issue, the sexologist points out, is that the giver may struggle with access if you're both lying down on the same surface so make sure the receiver is slightly higher. "Put a pillow under the hips of the person lying on their back as it offers an easier angle," she suggests.
2. THE SNIPER
The sniper sex position is another classic move, generally done with both partners positioned on the floor or a large bed, given that the giving partner has to be able to comfortably stretch their legs out behind them.
For those who struggle with lower back, hip, and/or knee pain during oral sex, this could be the perfect move as there's no need to kneel or flex the spine in this position. However, if you experience neck pain then a more head-on place may be better suited for you than the sniper. And for more ideas, take a look at our round-up on the best sex positions for lower back pain.
How to do it: The giving partner lies down on the bed to meet their partner in a prone position, lying on their stomach. Their arms should be diamond-shaped around the receiver's pelvic area to help them open up the vulva and reach the clitoris precisely with their tongue.
The receiving partner can either stretch their legs out or as shown here, curl up into more of a bundle with their legs parted to the sides to give their partner better access.
3. THE RIDER
This is another popular position, amazing for anyone looking for great foreplay techniques or one of the best lazy sex positions. Rather than being a horizontal pose, face sitting is exactly what the name suggests and offers a more vertical angle of stimulation for the receiver.
"Face sitting is a great position for those wanting to create a more dynamic experience because it's one of the most interactive positions as the receiver can thrust their hips and choose how to navigate the speed and intensity," says Munro.
It can be a playful position too though, she explains. "It's also one that explores power dynamics as the receiver can tease the giver with their genitals."
How to do it: Making sure that you're aligned with your partner will be key to making this position work. It's easiest for the giver to lie down on the bed first on their back, with a pillow behind their head if required. The receiver can then position themselves over their partner's face and kneel until their genitals are touching their partner's mouth. "The receiver can turn towards the giver and put their hands on their body for support or even administer dual stimulation," Munro says.
4. 69
The 69 sex position tends to divide people into two categories: those who love it and those who feel totally overwhelmed by it. Not only is it butter churner sex position-levels of athletic - especially for the person on top - it can be a little awkward to get the angle just right. However, it's almost the only oral sex position where you can give and receive at the same time so it's truly one of the best.
How to do it: One person lies down on their back with their legs outstretched, and the other climbs on top facing away from them with their knees on either side of their shoulder/neck area. Each person's genitals should be lined up with the other person's mouth which, from above, should look a little bit like the number '69'.
Propping a pillow behind the person on the bottom's head should help them to reach up without straining their neck too much. You could also try the 69 lying side-by-side next to each other if the person on top doesn't want a sex-position-turned-ab-workout this time around.
5. SIT AND DELIVER
This standing pose is very similar to the ballet dancer sex position for penetrative sex, so it makes for a perfect prelude or an alternative to the move. As one partner is sitting or kneeling down in front of the other, the position is ideal for anyone looking to explore new power dynamics.
The aptly-named sit and deliver oral sex position also makes it onto our list of the best ones as it's a winner for anyone looking to learn how to have sex in the shower. Unlike any of the others, you don't need a whole lot of space to make it work - just a spot the size of a shower tray or bath.
How to do it: "The person who is receiving can stand alone or lean against a wall, which can add support for the receiver while they're climaxing," explains Munro. "While receiving, separate your legs into a wider stance and lean your hips forward at an angle."
The giver then kneels in front of them and positions themselves slightly under their partner, perfectly in line with their clitoral region. "For extra comfort, the person can kneel on a pillow and tuck another pillow between their knees if needed," she says. If you are trying this pick of the standing sex positions out in the shower and you think it could be an issue, place a bath mat under you.
6. THE CHAIR
The chair sex position is undoubtedly one for the more athletic among us but if the moment takes you in the living room and you decide to have sex on the sofa then this position may come in handy.
When it comes to crazy sex positions, this one is definitely up there but provided you can make it work for you, there are so many benefits to be had, including mutual stimulation, a sense of excitement, and the added exhilaration of a head rush for the partner receiving on the chair.
How to do it: One partner sits upside down on the seat, as pictured above. Their back should be against the back of the chair, legs spread, and their head positioned facing downward. The other partner leans in, placing themselves as close as possible to their partner's face and nestles their own head between the partner on the chair's legs.
7. SIDEWAYS 69
The sideways 69 sex position is an easier version of the classic 69, with both partners lying down on their sides and resting on their hips rather than their hands and knees. It takes the physical pressure off the partner on top and ensures that everyone's comfortable for the whole duration.
As a result, it's the one to go for if you're looking for the best sex positions for lower back pain, as much like the sniper, it doesn't require much spine flexion.
How to do it: Both partners should be lie down in a spooning position, top-to-tail as close together as possible. Nestling in, each partner brings their pelvis as close as possible to their other partner's mouth. If needed, either partner can lift their upper leg to open up the area further.
8. DOGGY STYLE
Doggy style is one of the most common go-to sex positions for a reason: it's perfectly designed for the giver to hit the receiver's G-spot, one of the more sensitive regions of the vagina, and it offers great access to the clitoris for external stimulation too. Luckily, the same benefits apply to the oral sex version of the position.
"Just like the name suggests, doggy style oral sex is when one partner is on all fours and the other partner is kneeling down behind them, leaning into them to provide oral sex," says Lyndsey Murray, a couple's counselor and AASECT-certified sex therapist.
How to do it: The receiver should climb onto a bed, sofa, or another flat surface where there's some space behind them, going down onto all fours and opening their legs fairly wide. To make access for the giver a little easier, the receiver may want to lean down on their forearms rather than rest on their hands and arch their back, tilting their pelvis up towards the ceiling. This switch-up will lift the receiver's bottom higher into the air and naturally closer to the giver's mouth.
From here, the giver can either get onto the bed as well and lean down, bringing their mouth to their partner's genitals, or they can sit off the edge and bring their partner towards them.
This position is another great one if you're looking for a new way to incorporate oral sex into foreplay, as you can switch into the broken eagle sex position very easily from here or go for classic doggy style.
9. THE THRONE
An oral sex position fit for a queen, the throne is all about being confident and totally open with your partner about the different angles that work for you. As the person on the chair is elevated above and being stimulated from below, the angle of pleasure is totally up to the receiver, making it one of the more versatile oral sex positions.
How to do it: "This is where one partner sits, either in a chair or the edge of a bed, or couch, and the other partner kneels to give oral sex to the sitting partner," says Murray.
Play around with the angle of stimulation here to find the best one for you. This could mean the receiver resting their feet or one foot up on the bottom of the chair beside themselves, opening up totally for the giver. The receiver could also place their feet over their partner's shoulders, bringing them in closer, and even try the belly press trick. Alternatively, the receiver could shuffle down to the end of the chair towards their partner, leaning back slightly and giving them easier access for a higher intensity.
As a giver, if you or your partner is resting on a hard floor then place a softer surface underneath for comfort. "The kneeling partner can place a pillow under their knees for support," offers Murray.
10. THE ARCH
The arch oral sex position is especially good for anyone who experiences discomfort or pain while flexing their back (i.e bending over) and it mirrors one of the best sex positions after menopause, given the inclusion of a pillow (or pillows) stacked underneath the receiver.
How to do it: The person receiving oral sex here lies on their back with a stack of pillows tucked underneath their lower back. This can be one or several, depending on the individual's comfort level. The giver then slides in between their legs, propping themselves up on their elbows over the pillows for the best support, or kneeling at the bottom of a bed.
If the receiver wants to change the positioning, angle, or intensity, they have the freedom to do so by moving their hips.
11. SOLO
A night at home alone doesn't mean you need to miss out on the best oral sex positions. With a particular type of vibrator and some good mood lighting, you can replicate the feeling almost to the end.
How to do it: For this one, you'll need an oral sex toy or one of the best clitoral vibrators - like the Satisfyer Pro 2 Air Pulse Stimulator. With unique pulsating air vibrations, it's designed to almost exactly replicate the feeling of a partner's mouth with easy-to-use buttons and handling. Alternatively, there are lots of other oral sex toys out there - including Lovehoney's Sqweel 2 Oral Sex Stimulator.
Tips for oral sex
- Do your research: Regardless of the gender of your partner, doing your research is important if you're new to oral sex. "The first step in combating the orgasm gap is making sure everyone has a comprehensive education about the human body in all its different forms, and how best to stimulate different parts," says Javay Frye-Nekrasova MEd, a certified sex educator and pleasure expert.
- Become comfortable with talking about sex: Having the best oral sex is all about being confident and asking for what you want. This should be done kindly and with consideration for the other person but “if you can comfortably talk about sex then you can better talk about what you like with partners, express to them what you would want to be done differently, and how experiences can be improved," explains Frye-Nekrasova, who has partnered up with Lovehoney.
- Communicate during sex: The communication doesn't stop when your clothes come off though. Oral sex shouldn't be a performance. Keep the dialogue open between you and your partner throughout, being verbal about what feels good and what doesn't so much. Doing so may make the two of you feel more comfortable discussing issues outside of the bedroom too, helping to revive romance in the relationship.
- Explore other areas: When it comes down to the practicalities of improving your oral sex experience, focusing on the genitals is pretty essential - but you should always think about the other erogenous zones for arousal as well, such as the inner thighs, back, neck, shoulders, and nipples.
- Focus on the whole experience: Despite what it may look like, just focusing on getting through all the stages of how to have an orgasm during oral sex is missing the point a bit. This is one of the most intimate experiences you can have with another person, so think about the whole experience. If you're the receiver, you could hold your partner's hand while they go down on you or run your hands through their hair, any little acts that bring you closer together.
- Use lube (if you want to): Saliva is a perfectly good lubricant when it comes to oral sex as your mouth will naturally transfer it onto your partner's genitals and there's not too much friction involved without it. But dual stimulation may require a little extra help, so don't be afraid to bring a flavored lube into the bedroom for this - just check in with your partner as some people are sensitive to certain types.
Grace Walsh is woman&home's Health Channel Editor, working across the areas of fitness, nutrition, sleep, mental health, relationships, and sex. She is also a qualified fitness instructor. In 2024, she will be taking on her second marathon in Rome, cycling from Manchester to London (350km) for charity, and qualifying as a certified personal trainer and nutrition coach.
A digital journalist with over six years experience as a writer and editor for UK publications, Grace has covered (almost) everything in the world of health and wellbeing with bylines in Cosmopolitan, Red, The i Paper, GoodtoKnow, and more.
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